


Prom Bomb

by Samicable



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Humiliation, Humor, Idiots in Love, Lorenz makes a fool of himself, School Dance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-07
Updated: 2020-11-07
Packaged: 2021-03-09 05:28:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,272
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27429460
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Samicable/pseuds/Samicable
Summary: Lorenz is ready to enjoy the school dance with his date, Constance, but when it goes wrong...
Relationships: Constance von Nuvelle/Lorenz Hellman Gloucester
Comments: 3
Kudos: 3





	Prom Bomb

It was nearing the end of the academic year, and the fabled Garreg Mach University dance was inbound. Despite being a campus that could make any student from an opposing college even somewhat jealous, Garreg Mach University always held its dances elsewhere, for one reason or another, perhaps as a power move. Every year, students who attended were always eager to go to the dance with their dates, and this year was no different. Among the students that came to this year's dance was Lorenz Hellman Gloucester, a slim, indigo-haired first year student at Garreg Mach University. He was dressed in a snazzy black tuxedo with a fake red rose pinned to it, something he did to all of his clothes. His dress pants and shoes were both black as well, and his white socks were hard to notice as a result. To top it all off, he was also adorned with a violet necktie. Lorenz had few close friends at Garreg Mach University, likely due to his nature as a notoriously flirty person. Regardless of his reputation, he was able to secure himself a spot in the boys' sleek, white limousine.

This year, Garreg Mach University went all out with their dance: rather than being held at a dance hall like previous years, the big wigs who ran the university announced that they managed to rent a massive rectangular indoor stadium that would otherwise be used for a concert. It was as clean as new, decked out in Garreg Mach University-themed banners that spanned the walls of the stadium, inside and out. Hardly anyone could believe it when it was announced, and that gave everyone even more of a reason to be excited this year. Lorenz was one of the most prepared for the dance, being dressed in his snazzy attire and all, but since the dance was so grand this year, his patience was minimal.

It was 6:02 P.M. when the limousine arrived at the stadium despite the fact that the dance didn't start until 7:00 P.M. Lorenz exited the white limousine with the rest of the boys who managed to reserve passenger seats on it. There, they saw the grand stadium with a bunch of lights coming out of it that may as well have been signals for a helicopter or a plane to land. The boys were the first ones there, and they waited for their dates in the warm, late spring night.

"Ah, yes! I have finally arrived! I cannot bear to wait much longer for a dance this grand!" Lorenz exclaimed to nobody in particular. He took a seat at a steel bench near the stadium's main entrance, but since the students were going to use the main floor for the dance, their entrance would be the VIP entrance, usually reserved for players and coaches. About fifty-three minutes of bliss later, a bus containing some of the last few students who signed up for the bus arrived. Among them was a blue-eyed blonde lady about Lorenz's age who wore a blue hairband and a stylish light maroon dress with pale pink trim on the bottom and gold earrings adorned with one sapphire each. She spotted Lorenz and made a beeline towards him, taking a seat next to his left.

"Constance! At last, you're here! I was wondering when you'd arrive," said Lorenz.

Constance was a morose person in sunlight, but since it was nowhere to be found in the sky, her true personality was free to shine on its own. She lacked a family to call her own after a tragic event that caused her to despise sunlight, so she inhabited an orphanage that paid for her tuition instead. Constance and Lorenz met a few weeks back when she transferred to one of his classes, and Lorenz asked her to go to the dance when it was announced after being refused by everyone else. She agreed to accompany Lorenz, primarily because nobody had asked her out yet. She was just as eager to go to the school dance as he was, which was surely helped by her newly energized mood.

"I could ask you a similar question," she replied. "How have you been?"

"Marvelous, honestly," Lorenz replied. "As for you?"

"I am feeling better than I ever have been! I could just burst into laughter at the thought of it!" Constance pridefully began giggling, and Lorenz began to chuckle in kind. This lasted for about another minute before Lorenz decided to get up from the bench and head to where all the other students were heading.

"Constance, it is almost time for the dance! Follow me," Lorenz told her. She got up and the two of them began walking together to the otherwise inaccessible-to-the-public VIP entrance that allowed access to the main floor. They then found themselves in a large cluster of students who were starting to get impatient. It was 6:58 at that point, just two minutes before the dance was set to begin. Come 7:00 P.M., the cluster of students started to head through the entrance and the halls of the locker rooms into the stadium like filthy water flowing through a drain pipe. Lorenz and Constance stuck together and arrived in the stadium at about 7:02 P.M.

Once the two of them made it into the stadium, they looked around and saw exactly how professionally it was set up for the occasion. The whole floor was theirs for dancing, save for some benches and a space saved for a DJ, who hadn't arrived yet- perfect for letting people fill up the stadium floor in these first few minutes of the dance. On the edges they saw folding tables loaded with snacks and drinks with an ivory-colored chocolate fountain to boot! Neither of them were hungry just yet, but they both knew that it was a matter of time before they would be. Once they were done admiring the scenery, they got on the stadium floor to engage in conversation while they waited for the DJ.

"So, how was your day, Constance?" Lorenz asked.

"Simply put," Constance replied, "it... hasn't been the best of days. Don't get me wrong, today wasn't terrible, but it could have been leagues better."

"What a shame," Lorenz told her. "What went wrong?"

"This morning, my orphanage announced that they had to cut their budget a bit to pay for the tuitions of those who attend college," Constance told Lorenz, "so me and my companions back there will not have the luxuries we once did."

"Did anything else happen today that hurt you?" Lorenz asked.

"No, not really," Constance stated, "aside from the sunlight and losing my precious hand fan!"

"Ah, that's terrible!" Lorenz exclaimed to her with a concerned look on his face.

"Worry not," Constance spoke up to Lorenz, "for after tonight's dance, I shall search for it posthaste tomorrow!"

"That's a very good thing to hear," Lorenz told her.

"Indeed, it is," Constance responded.

After they finished talking, it was about 7:09 P.M. Just then, a DJ had finally arrived on the scene. He was a normal-sized, middle-aged man clad in a white suit with a black bowtie. Although it was clear that he was only at the stadium for the job, he still had a genuine-looking grin on his face, even if it was relatively faint. He walked up to the DJ station and took a seat before picking up the microphone.

"Sorry I was late," he announced. Everyone paused what they were doing once he made the announcement. "Are you having fun?"

Everyone in the stadium cheered with a "YEAH!" that could be heard from outside.

"Great! Then let the music begin!" he said in the microphone. He pulled up the laptop on the DJ station and began a long playlist full of some of the latest musical hits. Lorenz found it somewhat odd that he and every other student at the dance dressed up to dance to music that clearly wasn't meant for a truly formal occasion, but he and Constance began dancing anyway. Lorenz took Constance by the hands and began to perform all kinds of fancy footwork, and Constance followed in kind. The two of them were clearly having a blast as the peppiness of the music made the two of them dance like never before.

"Constance, are you having fun?" Lorenz asked.

"Of course I am!" Constance replied. She wasn't lying- it was just the first song and Constance was having the time of her life. She and Lorenz continued their energetic dance while holding each other's hands, not letting go until the song finished after 4 minutes. The next song was notably more mellow, and Constance immediately recognized the melody. She loved a lot of different genres of music, and also enjoyed singing along to it. She was quite the singer to boot, and there was no denying that she would join in on one of her favorite songs.

"Ahahahaha! I adore this song, Lorenz!" she told her date. "Ever since I first heard it last year!"

"I don't recognize it, though," he responded.

"Well, you're missing out!" she replied.

Once the lyrics kicked in, Constance began to chant along with the music as she performed various improvised dance moves. Lorenz watched her dance and looked at his date with nothing but stars in his eyes as she danced her heart out, singing along with the music. He saw how enthusiastic she was when she performed her dance, and she knew that Lorenz was watching her as she danced. They felt like their bond was growing stronger by the second. Once the song finished, Constance felt a bit worn out, but not enough to stop dancing. The last song was three minutes or so long, and the next song, which was notably more upbeat, began almost immediately afterwards. Lorenz took Constance back by the hand and they danced through the song with more intensity than the first song. They felt like nothing could stop them now that they were dancing with such energy.

When the two lovebirds were more energized, another song came on, and Lorenz recognized it immediately: it was his personal favorite song. He couldn't not dance to it. Lorenz had been trained decently well in ballroom dancing, and he felt like it was finally time for him to show his skills to his classmates. He took Constance by the hand, and she blushed almost immediately when he carefully gripped both of her hands with his own. Once the song really kicked in, he started to dorkily dance to the beat with his partner, who shared his energy and happily followed with his movements through the first verse. Once the second verse began, Lorenz decided to let go of her so she could do her own dances as well.

Lorenz then proceeded to start moonwalking backwards a few steps, not aware where he was in comparison to the walls. His first tread backwards was relatively safe, and he even stopped partway through to pose stylishly with the beat. But as Lorenz began his second tread backwards, he was clearly unaware of what was behind him: the snack table, complete with the ivory chocolate fountain. Lorenz hadn't paid even an ounce of attention to it since he arrived to the stadium, though it had inevitably entered his sight a few times since then. As such, when Lorenz backed up, he would be met with a nasty- but also tasty- surprise.

He bumped into the back of the table with enough force to send the snacks forward a notable amount. More importantly, his impact with the table sent the chocolate fountain forward enough so that the molten chocolate splashed his back. This didn't break the fountain or send it to the ground, but the chocolate coated the back of Lorenz's hair, the back of his neck, and the top of his back, staining his tuxedo as well. Lorenz felt the sensation on his back and gasped loudly, catching the attention of one too many students nearby. Unfortunately, none of those students would answer to the name Constance.

"Hey, buddy, how about you look where you're going next time?" one male student, clearly unamused by the incident, remarked to Lorenz, who visibly gulped.

"Um, I... I was not..." he tried to remark, now embarrassed by his predicament.

"I know you weren't paying attention, you fucking idiot!" another clearly hungry female student told him angrily. "And because you didn't pay attention, you crashed into the chocolate fountain! More importantly, you've killed my appetite for chocolate-coated cookies! I'm going to have to eat them plain now, and I can eat plain cookies any day of the week! Now fuck off!"

"I am sorry," Lorenz replied hastily. By that point, his favorite song had ended, and Lorenz was more embarrassed than he was when he initially crashed into the chocolate. Lorenz then rushed to the locker room. It was 7:33 P.M. now, and Lorenz knew that he'd have to spend some time washing himself up as much as possible in the locker rooms that he entered the stadium from. When he arrived in the locker rooms, he was all alone. He proceeded to head to a bathroom, which thankfully contained three showers, all of which were back to back with each other. Lorenz knew that the sink wouldn't be enough, so he decided to use the water from one of the showers to get his head wet.

Constance didn't notice Lorenz's mishap, so it took her a while for her to begin to wonder where he went. She then began to ask around as to his whereabouts until she managed to ask one of the students who saw the incident. This student didn't scowl at Lorenz like two of the other students did, but was still annoyed by the incident nonetheless.

"Excuse me, have you seen Lorenz? He's my date for the dance, and I haven't seen him for a few minutes," she asked the student.

"Lorenz?" she asked, clearly not knowing his name. "What does he look like?"

"Well," Constance said, with pride in her voice, "he has blue hair and a rose on his clothes."

"Oh, that twerp?" she said, annoyed by the reminder of what had happened a few minutes ago. "I think he ran into the locker rooms to cry."

"Wait, what?" she exclaimed with genuine concern. Constance proceeded, almost immediately, to rush towards the locker rooms. "I hope he's okay!" Once she got into the locker rooms, she searched every nook and cranny until she entered the men's bathroom. Lorenz was not the kind of person to enter the women's bathroom, so the girl's bathroom was out of the running when it came to looking for her date. She opened the door, and proceeded to find Lorenz, having been somewhat silent for his whole time in the bathroom. He succeeded in washing all the chocolate off his neck and more importantly, out of his hair. However, he couldn't get it out of his tuxedo without risking having to wait for it to dry, and thus, missing the rest of the dance.

"There you are!" Constance called for her date. "I've been searching all over for you ever since you left the stadium."

"Why would you need to look for that long?" Lorenz asked his date. "It is obvious that I would have to wash myself off after getting my back covered in chocolate."

"You got your back covered in chocolate?" Constance asked, having been unaware of what really happened to Lorenz.

"Not my whole back," Lorenz clarified, "but enough of it that I had to run here, clean myself off, and wait for those who saw my foolishness to forget. I believe I may still need some more time... perhaps until 8:15, give or take."

"But you're going to miss a good portion of the dance!" Constance told her date.

"I'm aware of that, but such are the consequences of one who acts like a fool," Lorenz replied.

"That makes decent sense," Constance replied back, notably in a worse mood than before.

The two then began to sit together in the bathroom, waiting for enough time to pass before Lorenz was willing to come back to the stage. They passed the time by talking to each other about the unfortunate event that happened to Lorenz, and he opened up everything to Constance in a good amount of detail. Only one other student ever walked into the bathroom through that whole interval of time, and all he did to them was bat an eye at them for a moment and then look away to use the urinal instead. Neither Constance nor Lorenz looked at him as he used the stall and then left the bathroom.

Once the clock struck 8:17, the two dates felt like they could feasibly leave the bathroom together, and that's what they did. Once they exited the locker rooms and returned to the stadium, it seemed like everyone had gotten over the incident. Most notably, the chocolate fountain was gone, likely to prevent anyone from knocking chocolate onto their backs for the rest of the dance. The two of them re-entered the crowd of dancing students without trying to take too much attention, notably avoiding the snack table to the best of their ability. They succeeded in not being too embarrassing as the reintegrated themselves into the crowd. Nobody ostracized them when they returned from the locker rooms- the first good omen for the remainder of the dance.

The two of them started dancing for a while longer to a bunch of different pop songs, some of which they'd never heard before the dance. Lorenz and Constance kept this momentum up for a while longer until they noticed an open circle, clearly meant for a dance battle. Lorenz wanted in on the action, especially after the big hit his self-esteem took.

"Constance," he whispered to his date, "do you mind if I enter the dance battle they're having?" he asked his date.

"Of course not," she told Lorenz as she started to giggle. "In fact, I'd love to see you try!"

"Good," Lorenz replied. He proceeded to enter the circle after the two dancers finished their battle and one of them withdrew into the crowd. Constance then budged herself between two viewers who were up front to watch the dancers 'battle'. Nobody objected to Lorenz showing up in the spotlight of the dance battle, primarily due to the fact that the dance battlers hadn't witnessed the chocolate sloshing on Lorenz.

"Your dancing is fantastic," Lorenz told his opponent haughtily, as if nothing happened prior, "but let me show you how it's done!"

The next song started, and Lorenz's opponent was as energetic as could be. His dance moves were more wild in comparison to Lorenz's more composed dance moves, which wasn't hard to notice. Constance chanted for her date the whole time, even as everyone else chanted for Lorenz's opponent. The song entered its next verse, and Lorenz was fired up by how different and more energetic the next part of the song was in comparison to the beginning, almost completely changing his dancing style to match. Lorenz put a bit too much energy into his dance, though, as evident by when he tried to do a split to finish off his moves with the song. When he spread his legs out and lowered to the ground, the crowd heard an unmistakable ripping sound almost perfectly timed with the music. Lorenz unofficially lost the dance battle as a result.

"Ah! I surely did not expect that," Lorenz exclaimed. Everyone around him proceeded to laugh except for Constance, as she knew that everyone around Lorenz was laughing at him, not with him. Lorenz felt humiliated once more, though not as much as when he found his back covered in chocolate. Only this time, there was no way to cover up his mishap- there was no sewing material near him, and worse, the tear was right down his underside, where anyone looking at him head-on could see exactly what had happened. Naturally, the first thing Constance did instead was run toward her date to check to see if he was OK after he got up and withdrew from the dance circle.

"Lorenz!" she cried out. "What has happened to you?"

"I appear to have torn my pants," he replied with a sense of sadness in his voice.

"Is that so?" she asked. "Because I still think your dancing was still as splendid as ever!"

"Do you truly think so?" Lorenz asked in a concerned tone.

"Of course I do!" Constance exclaimed. "Regardless of the condition of your clothing, you are still a phenomenal dancer!"

"Thank you," Lorenz replied. Despite the fact that Lorenz knew that Constance had begun to care about his well-being long in advance, her concern over his torn pants as well as her sticking by his side in the bathroom to hear him out made him finally feel it in his heart. This wasn't just any lady Lorenz could easily flirt with in hopes of beginning a relationship with- no, this was a lady who was clearly returning the affection Lorenz wanted from a woman. Constance was worthy of his heart, and not only did Lorenz know it, but Constance herself felt it as well.

Come 9:00 P.M., there was only an hour left of the dance. Nobody was really tired yet, and neither Constance nor Lorenz were exceptions. Songs kept playing the whole way through, and despite Lorenz's ripped pants being noticeable to anyone who looked at him head-on, he kept dancing, even though people could occasionally see glimpses of his polka-dotted underwear as he danced with Constance. It was less embarrassing the second time for Lorenz, and nobody could see his private parts anyway because the tear did not rip his underwear and it was directly below his head anyway. Save for the occasional glimpses people got of Lorenz's underwear, nothing bad happened to him for the rest of the dance. That is, until the last song of the night, which was saved to be something incredibly special.

"It seems like our time at this stadium is coming to a close," the DJ told everyone on the mic. People were starting to get tired of the dance at that point, and it showed, but there was still enough enthusiasm for one more song. "But I have one last song for the night! I hope you all had fun!"

He proceeded to put on the hottest pop song of the year thus far, and almost everyone was far more excited hearing the first few notes alone. There was much rejoicing among the students at the dance, regardless of whether they were in a couple. Lorenz enjoyed singing a fair amount, and it showed when he decided to join in the chorus that consisted of almost every other student at the dance. As the song progressed, Lorenz continued to sing along, and in time, he started to dance along with the last of his physical energy. However, that was cut short when his Lorenz's artificial rose was thrown off his tuxedo and he slipped on it like a banana peel, tearing the rose in the process.

Lorenz then fell flat on his face and on the wooden floor, breaking his nose in the process. Blood started to pour out of his nostrils as a result of the collision, and anyone who noticed was terrified. This included Constance, who gasped audibly at the sight of her date on the ground, bleeding from his face. With her help, Lorenz got up, still bleeding, albeit less heavily than before. The red stained his face like a mustache, and he felt lightheaded from blood loss. By the time he got up, the song was over, and all the other students at the dance were leaving. Lorenz saw only Constance with him once he reoriented himself.

"Constance! I'm glad to see you're still here," Lorenz told his date.

"I wasn't going to leave you here to bleed, Lorenz!" Constance told him in a serious tone. "You invited me here, so I didn't want to leave without you! It's common courtesy!"

"Surely it's more than that," Lorenz replied.

"Indeed, Lorenz," Constance replied. "I not only am staying with you because you are the one who invited me, but because I enjoy you and your company!"

"Are you being serious?" Lorenz said in a mixture of disbelief and shock.

"I am as serious as can be!" Constance replied. She proceeded to give Lorenz a big hug. He could hardly believe this- Constance saw him rip his pants, fall on the floor, and she heard of him making a fool of himself, but here she was, wrapping her arms around his body in joy. "You humiliated yourself twice in front of a crowd and kept going! I find that admirable."

Lorenz was flattered by the compliment he received from Constance, and he proceeded to wrap his own arms around Constance. They were alone in the stadium, and once their hug ended, they left the stadium together in each others' arms. The two of them were so happy to be together and at the school dance at all that they didn't care what happened for the three hours beforehand. They just started to love each other in a way they never anticipated, and both of them knew that their brand new relationship was going to last.


End file.
